my marriage

One time this boy I didn’t really know wrote me a seven-page letter discussing my scent, my eyes and my teeth.

This man was not my husband. But he did convince me that men were scary and I didn’t want any of those in my life for awhile. So about the time I was telling a friend how I didn’t want to date anyone because of the annoying obligation of having to call someone and tell them about your day, I met Shea.

I was at a friend’s house who invited him over. We played CatchPhrase and I swooned when he said “Ata girl!” after I correctly yelled out Axl Rose as the lead singer of Guns N Roses. Then we went to a bar. And while trying to flirt with me, he portrayed my favorite college sports teams in a false light. So I corrected him. Because questioning a die-hard sports fan’s knowledge is how you get the boys.

Back at my friend’s house, I brought out my charm and puked. Medications and beer do not mix. Shea prevailed though and kissed me. BEFORE I BRUSHED MY TEETH. Horrified, I fell asleep and thought to myself, “we cannot date because this would be our first story.”

And my friends, not only did I date this boy but I married him.

He proposed on December 13, 2008. I came home from a lunch with my friend and her mom to find a note and GPS sitting in the doorway. From there I went on a journey through our relationship with a love letter at each stop. I went to my apartment, my old workplace, the statue we enjoyed taking pictures with, Jamba Juice and finally, our favorite lake area. Picking up my last letter out of the snow, I read about his beliefs on marriage. I looked up, bawling, and he was walking down the path. He got down on one knee and made a beautiful speech of which I can remember nothing except “..and I never want this to end.”

During a low point in college, I wrote a list of all the things I needed in a husband. Bias aside, Shea truly completes every one. I can trust him. He makes me feel confident, pretty and powerful. He magically deals with my irritability, melodramatic behavior and irrational fears with grace. He encourages my faith. He cares deeply about the essence of a marriage and what makes it strong. He never ever lets me doubt his love for me. And most importantly, he’s my very best friend.

We believe marriage takes a lot of work. A lot of sacrifice. And a lot of prayer. Our first year has been easy despite the fact we both switched jobs, moved to a new state and went on a hyper-intensive budget. He hates the fact I can’t ask for help, and I hate the fact he cannot listen to a baseball game and me at the same time.

We love traveling, running, sports, serving at our church, playing games, drinking coffee and wine, and strolling around the Farmer’s Market.  We’re excited for a house, babies, more disposable income and the days when all we have to do is beat each other at Scrabble. Until then, we’re happy just being.