Wednesday, November 3, 2010

another reason for pretty underwear

The first sign of trouble was the doctor showing the students how to give a shot. And something about anaphylactic shock.

The students giving shots at our employee health fair did good though, and I got my vaccine with little pain. Picked up my round bandaid and was on my way toward the other screening stations.

The cholesterol screening was only a little finger prick test. The students there were talking to me about my job and making me drink water because my skin was too "tough" and I needed to make my blood flow more. Whatever, I drank away. Keep in mind I still have not been pricked.

Then I start feeling a little dizzy but try to maintain conversation about my awesome Halloween costume. I have to sit back in the chair a little,  and they start making comments on my very pale face. They run to get a doctor and by the time she comes I'm seeing less stars and more black. Doctor woman says "I know you're in a skirt, and this is not going to be fun but we have to get you on the floor."

I was hoisted down and there I lied for the next 20 minutes with the doctor's coat tied around my legs. The doctor made jokes about "this is why your grandma tells you never to forget to wear your underwear." Me: "What?! I'm totally wearing underwear."

They made me then sit on the concrete floor for another 10 minutes and explained that woman, especially of the small variety, are prone to passing out after flu shots and that's why you're supposed to wait 10 minutes before walking around - jabbing her words in the directions of the shot-giving students. They still didn't let me leave until they thought I had proper color in my face.

Cause of the fainting? 1) I hadn't eaten since last night because I was fasting for the cholesterol test. 2) I am prone to low blood pressure swings thanks to my mother who once had to lie under the cake table at a wedding reception. 3) Children are prone to fainting after flu shots - my body slightly resembles a child's.

She said 75 percent of people who pass out after flu shots leave with concussions so I am lucky. Right because lying in front of all your coworkers on a concrete floor with a jacket tied around your knees with a doctor joking about not wearing underwear is SO much better.

1 comment:

  1. 1. You need to write a book about your life.
    2. Please put this in the book.
    3. Also, please put the pre-hubs boy chart in there along with the letter from milk boy.

    The end.

    p.s. I miss you.

    ReplyDelete

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