Thursday, November 11, 2010

saying nothing

I went to the doctor yesterday for my week-long saga of nausea, dizziness and generally feeling awful. As is the trend, my doctor assumed I was pregnant. Even though I explained the timing is not logical.

We did determine my blood pressure is too low when I am standing. More on par with numbers for small children or professional athletes. No cure, just "hang onto something when you stand up."

I am then escorted back to the lab where I ask to lay down for my barrage of blood work since needles and staying conscious seem to be a problem lately.Then I had to ask for water so that I could eventually pee in a cup (high maintenance patient here).

When I am done, I walk to another room and put my pee cup in a sink. I have to sit in a chair while the lab tech does the pregnancy and UTI test in front of me. She's joking about the machines doing two tests at once and casually rustling her papers around. I'm reading a letter from God to his children typed in comic sans pasted to the wall. I am positive that my God would never send letters in such a disturbing font.

When it's done, she says nothing.

I have to walk with her to a copy room where she tapes the test results to another sheet and makes copies. She says nothing. We walk back over to the doctors office together, and she hands my results to the nurse saying, "here are your answers." The nurse walks with me to the exam room and says, "I'll show him these results, and he'll be back in to talk to you about them." She says nothing about the actual results.

Now I have to wait 10 minutes before the doctor returns to tell me I am not pregnant, which I already knew but was starting to feel borderline-crazy about.

So now I am waiting for blood work results. I'm hoping for a nice infection that requires just a few pills to make me feel brand new but assures Shea that dressing me in my pajamas when I fall asleep at 8:30 with a computer on my lap wasn't just a ploy.


  1. I'm sorry to hear you are still feeling nausea and really hope it's nothing serious. While silence can be a killer (especially as it relates to health/tests) her stupid cracks about the machinery could have been pushed me to shout (to fill the silence of course) "I don't care about the machines-just tell me what the (bleep) is wrong with me!" But..that's just me. Most others have more patience than I do.

    Hope you get to feeling better...

  2. Icks. Hoping for an infection that takes a few pills to knock out, girlie. Doctors offices are so random like that. Ugh. Sorry for all that. I love how they KINDA act like you're full of it when you say you're not pregnant...sheesh.

  3. I am sending positive, healthy thoughts your way.