Wednesday, August 18, 2010

the fantasy life

My fantasy would include things like big bowls of popcorn, another seven seasons of Gilmore Girls, tank tops and sweatpants, iced mocha and Shea agreeing to make the bed for the rest of our lives.

Shea's fantasy includes spending countless hours on, waking up early to make sure a line up is in place before the Sunday games begin, analyzing injury reports and watching real games all in the name of fakeness or as you know it, fantasy football.

Imagine my self-disappointment when I received this email: "c martin has invited you to join an ESPN Fantasy Football league: Mystery Inc.." Nothing against Cmartin, I agreed to this activity without real acknowledgement of what I was getting myself into. The endless discussions about rushing yards, sacks and trade deadlines. It does not even remotely resemble a Gilmore Girls revival.

Steps to a successful fantasy football team for someone who prefers reality:

1. Creative team name. Check.  

Bend and snap

It's funny, you like it.

2. Find super secret source to create draft strategy since husband is in league and refuses to come to the rescue for fear I will destroy his team.

I can't tell you who it is because he's obviously super secret hence the disguise. But I will tell you he's been doing fantasy football for 20 years (he's obviously old and bored) and writes sports for a living. And I hired him once so he's obviously indebted to me forever. Plus he sends me Excel documents to lead me to drafting success. That's the kind of nerdy help I need.

3. Follow injury reports. I followed some Twitter people. That's as far as I am willing to go. Seriously, I can't believe I cared enough to take the time to read about someone who twisted their knee at training camp.

Our draft is Monday. Silly, I tell you. Just silly.


  1. Make the most creative team name ever, hire John Madden, follow a fantasy football psychic. Your efforts are futile because I will win this league!

  2. You know you'll miss myself or Glynn coming over on a Sunday to watch the Vikings game and have multiple windows/teams open to track our progess. Don't deny it.

  3. I will miss it David...I will miss it...

  4. i completely agree to the 6 more seasons of gilmore girls
    and my husband is the same way :)

  5. Um what league are you in? I'm not allowed to join Jack's. :(

  6. 1. I love your name. For some reason this picture reminds me of when we went to get manicures in Hutchinson. I think the lady wore tiger print. Anywho...

    2.I love that your secret source has a disguise and that you have a picture of it. Good blogging, my friend.

    3. Seth is not allowed to make the bed without my help because he doesn't get the sides even.